Leaves a Bad Taste in Your Mouth

The other day hubby was on his way home from work and thought that he would call to see if I wanted anything. He was offering to stop on his way home to pick me up something. What a man! I noted that we were out of both dish soap and dishwasher detergent. Not a good thing, unless you want to do your dishes with shampoo. "Gee K. Anne, your dishes are so silky soft, what's your secret?" "Rinse, lather and repeat of course!" I already dislike doing the dishes, so no way were they showering with me. I don't have that kind of relationship with them. I want to be just friends and they want more, but that is so not going to happen. Thus, I asked him to pick up some dishwashing supplies at the store. When hubby walked in the door I was presented with the sack of much needed soap. The mighty hunter returneth. Yes, yes! As God as my witness, we will have clean dishes again! (Sorry I was having a Tara moment there.) I scurried to the kitchen to investigate the purchases. In the bag was our regular brand of dish soap, but in a new scent. Oooh! Citrus-y! Then I pulled out the Cascade. Now this threw me for a loop as it is the most costly of the dish washer detergents at the store, and hubby is not known for buying the more expensive brands of household items. I checked it out and then opened it up for it's test run through the wash. Soon the whole kitchen started to smell fresh and melon-y. Not an unpleasant scent. I was quite impressed that I could get clean dishes and a sweet smelling kitchen in one shot. After the wash cycle was done I put the dishes away in their cabinets and decided to grab a glass of ice water while I was at it. Using a freshly washed glass of course. The first couple of sips of water were cool and refreshing. Then I set my glass down for a few minutes while I did something else. I came back thirsty and craving some more water. I lifted the glass to my lips and took a deep gulp. Big mistake. It tasted like soap! In fact, it tasted like there was perfume and soap in my water.* At first I thought that it may be just me. Maybe my taste buds were playing a horrible, horrible trick on me. "Yeah, we'll get her for sabotaging us with those hot wings. They killed Kenny!" "Let's strike!" "no, I have a more diabolical plan. Let's make everything taste like... SOAP!" I took another sip and sure enough it was as awful as the last. Dang it. Sure the Cascade cleans the dishes and makes your kitchen smell good, but you can't eat off of or drink out of any of the dishes it was washed with. And yes, I did try using the dishes and found out that it transferred that same yucky taste to food. What was I going to do with these dishes? I couldn't be serving everyone soap flavored food and beverages! Use bad language in my house will you? Here wash out your mouth with some delicious cake and a nice glass of milk. Wahahaha! (evil laughter)** What in the world were they thinking? Don't they test these products? Do you think that years of working in a soap factory screwed their sense of taste? Eeew! I wonder if you can get worker's comp for that, or if they consider it a perk. You know, depending upon whose cooking they are forced to choke down. (No hubby isn't running down to the local soap factory to put in his application. Although I can tell from that little gleam in his eyes that he is tempted.) So what did I get to do? Go to the store and buy my regular dishwasher detergent, Electrasol, and re-washed the dishes. Ahhh! So much better. The water is cool and crisp again and the food, it tastes like food. Okay, okay, so the food tastes like my cooking and I suck at that, but hey, it's at least edible now! Cascade Complete... No need to pre-wash! You just have to wash your dishes with this. Then drive to the store, buy our competitor. Drive all the way home. Re-load all the clean dishes you just put away and wash them all over again. Why? Because our detergent infuses your dishware with soapy-goodness and apparently some wussies out there can't handle it. They can't handle the soapy truth! Anybody want some slightly used Cascade? It will make your kitchen smell real purdy! *Anyone who has ever tried that spray the perfume in the air and quick dash through it trick has no doubt gotten some in their mouth/stuck in their nose during said process. Very yucky, and apparently not the way you are supposed to use perfume. Who knew? Sure we have warning labels on dryers telling us not to use them while showering, duh. But no warning about spray fallout and how gross it is. Where's the warning label on the bottle for that? Warning: Do not snort perfume. Do not taste perfume. Trust me on that one. **Yes, in my supreme stupidity I feel the need to point out that Wahahaha is an evil laugh while Hahaha is not. Yes, I am a geek. And no I have nothing better to do with my time. Sad isn't it?